It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
i regret nothing . he quoted dr. suess . he deserved that bj .
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
he called me from germany to tell me about all the gummy bears he bought...i'm doubting his sobriety
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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