He uses pillows to masturbate.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
There is nothing wrong with wanting a slide attached to your staircase
No big deal, we were just two friends having sex. It's perfectly normal we don't remember. Water under the sex bridge,
I can feel the alcohol in my calves
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
It would have been the trifecta of dick for her.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Why are you naked at 4pm?
Its my birthday, I dont have to wear clothes
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
Randomize
