I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
Just mixed vicodin and mucinex. This cold just got fun.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
he turned down sex AND sandwiches. who the hell does that?!
Dude sorry but it totally wasn't worth going back in there for yous shoes
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
OPIZZABONMYDICK
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
What's an appropriate outfit for wearing to hangout with a girl you've talked to once, and had a 4way with?
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
Randomize
