Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
my mom just asked me, concerned, if I swallowed.
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I was out of breath when we were getting started and he offered me his inhaler so he's a keeper
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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