After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I just had to download an app to edit pictures on my new phone. The things I do for sexting...
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
I just found out I lost my virginity the same day my parents did, 25 years later. This is my life.
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
It is officially Christmas time in Chicago. There's a drunk hobo on the CTA singing the first 2 lines of Frosty the Snowman over and over and over.
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
Is it weird that I'm smoking a cig on my back patio in a sports bra and underwear?
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Randomize
