I need to have sex with someone before he does. I need to win this break up!
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
just shaved my legs at the gas station bathroom before going to the club. is that too ghetto?
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
We will. we just need a little inspiration.... in smoke form.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
You're at a grade school volley ball game with a yeti of tequila. You've passed extra
i gave head in a cab last night. get on my level.
How does the curb feel today?
It's stronger than my elbow. But I found my lighter while I was down there.
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