No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
new excercise plan: walk a mile get a bj then walk a mile home
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
She was wasted talking to my dad about the hunger games than she passed out in the shower and flooded the hotel room...
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
Randomize
