Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
My cat gives me a boner
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
At least you got some premium homework time. Still drinking vodka from a coffee cup?
I switched to water. When the numbers get blurry you are no longer being productive.
Bacon Cheddar rum burgers are as great as they sound. I knew that 100 proof Captain would be good for something other than vomit.
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
You know what would make the espn body photos even better? If anyone knew who any of those fucking athletes were. That, and maybe not feature Gary Player.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
Google Maps needs to have a hungover setting. That bitch talks too loud and all I want is breakfast tacos & a bloody fucking mary.
Dude, I'm at a wedding and there's a mashed potato bar and bacon strip appetizers. I'm getting all emotional.
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