Sry I called you an 8
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Oh god he's like Julia Roberts in pretty woman... And I'm the one who's gotta make a lady out of him.
We are going to need a water proof camera with a flash....exit routes....lots of booze.....and a tutu for good measure
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
I was shitfaced. I filled my contact case WITH TANNING LOTION
we are eating waffles in the pillow fort. Still think you're too straight for a threesome?
I'll be right over.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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