worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
Life lesson: Don't ever put your penis in a crazy girl. Especially if she's married. And has a kid.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
There's a black statue of liberty dancing on the side of the road. Please hold while I join him.
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
They don't have a Valentines Day card for the married guy I'm sleeping with. It can't use the words, love, soulmate, you're the only one for me...and obviously it can't be anything related to spending the day together because that's not happening.
We keep making plans but he keeps getting arrested. Such a tease
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