yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
I had a dream last night that Anthony Bourdain gave me a vibrator.
When do i get to see u next week?
When I teabag your entire family
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
he told me he once ran a blackmarket liquor store out of his house. thats all it took for me to go home with him
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
i was gonna fuck her but then she started eatin sushi from her purse. i really need to raise my standards
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Would it be irresponsible to use my tax refund for a boob job?
Yes. Highly encouraged though.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
the day i stop sending you hentai screenshots is the day i actually act like an adult, and TRUST ME. THAT AINT HAPPENING ANYTIME SOON.
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
