I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I want to dip my vagina in sugar. Not only will it be sweet, but it will have a nice sparkle.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
what's not responsible about a pool full of beer?
So that'd what fifty dollars of chicken at 7/11 looks like. Made it to work on time. Puked twice. BOOM.
Oh. My. God. Dad smoked a bowl. He's been playing cards...I just told a story and when I was done, he got really close to my face and very seriously asked me if he had cheese in his beard. I'm about to die.
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
Randomize