You're completely useless in the revolution.
hes 24 and dating a highschool junior and keeps saying how happy he is. happy about what? her ACT score??
he was lying next to me and i saw him text "score" to someone.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Drinking wine while working. Yay.
Just had sex at the YMCA.
We are so productive today.
Randomize
