they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
dude sorry about putting my finger in your butt last nite i was wasted and thought it was mine
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
I wonder when walk of shame thursdays in the rain will finally make me stop drinking.
Currently playing charity bingo with coworkers so if u were ever gonna send a dick pic now is the time
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
This whole having a new phone thing is like starting all over in life with a clean slate! (My old text convos are gone)
New phone new life!
who knew magic tricks and sex would actually go together?
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
