So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
its family weekend so i'm givin my little bro a tour of everywhere ive thrown up on campus
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
He must be a special kind of stupid to cheat on a women who works at a funeral home. Does he not understand you can get rid of dead bodies easier than most Americans?
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
STOP FUCKING TELLING PEOPLE ABOUT THAT TIME THAT GUY CAME ON MY FACE WHILE I WAS ASLEEP!!!
She's kind of holyer-than-thou, like god himself came down and said "please cock block your roommate at every opportunity, and if you think she's thinking of sex, tell her she's a whore"
I'd send you a picture as proof but I want to marry him some day and that would be a deal breaker.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
