This ain't no lie cnn says sonny n cher's dtr chastity is going to have sex reassignment surgery to become a man named chaz
Not surprised. I always thought Cher was a very passable post op transexual.
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
I began mixing captain Morgan and jack daniels and called it captain jack sparrow. I puked. a lot.
The novelty of Nekkid Straight Roommate has faded.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
As he was going down on me, I looked over his shoulder and said "ohh a Christian mingle commercial is on"
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
You can get gift cards to the liquor store! This changes everything.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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