apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Tempted to tell the Titos promoters at this bar that they are doing the lords work.
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize
