Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
Did I really make him pull over to give the homeless guy my bra?
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
I was eating leftover taco bell in bed at 3 in the afternoon. I can't throw any stones
My mom and my boss just had a discussion on FB about the sexual habits of old people. The magic of the Internet.
Learn from my mistakes. DO NOT try to steam a garment of clothing while you are wearing it. The burn is not worth the de-wrinkle.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
Randomize
