): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
It's almost like sex with her has gotten boring... like it's still good, but the creativity is lacking... it's times like these that i wish she still wanted me to gag her
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
Can we skip lunch and do power hour sex time from now on? I'll let you eat nachos off my body if you really need the food.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I take it you're alive?
Mostly. Can't quite control my arms.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
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