at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
My sister was borrowing my phone when the sext came through. She just said "wow. He's got a nice dick!" Then went on like nothing happened. Outed by a dick pic and its no big deal. Best sister ever.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
I've got the dick your vagina needs, but not the one it deserves right now.
So I'm guessing that puking on a camper is a straight path to instant termination?
I feel like my vagina was punched by chuck Norris, a Brazilian chuck Norris.
I'm getting "congrats on your engagement" shots. I need to get engaged more often!
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
Randomize
