If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Guy just came in wearing only shorts, on his hand was written - my name is ... Call ... And tell them where i am, thanx - in permanent marker, ordered his favorite dish, and left w/out touching it. It's snowing outside.
What's your ideal size in a man?
I just asked if you could cover my shift tomorrow......
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
I got sprayed in the face with titty milk and I'm still so traumatized
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud š³
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
I mean, heās listed as āAndrew DC Threesomeā in my phone. THATS HOW I REMEMBER HIM! How is that not the start of a fairytale?
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