no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
No more Irish car bombs ever.
She was about to go down when you guys iced me. Thanks bro
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
just really comprehended the fact that I'm getting high at the same place I used to play as a child. the nostalgia and thc is mixing together in one, intense wave. WHO HAVE I BECOME
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
You showed up at 4 am holding a beer and wearing a wig you apparently found in the dumpster.
That explains some things...
He almost got to me tonight but then I was like fuck it I'm going to dance with a teli-tubby on the bar so fuck you
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