wanna go halves on a baby?
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
We have your weave and dirt in our room.
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
I think i'm the first person to get kicked out of a club while completely sober. Come outside please!!
He called his dick the "gentle giant"
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
Started dabbing in blow again because he always hated that I did it. Yuh I’m doing drugs but at least I’m doing me?
Randomize
