is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Omg I def was not. I wasn't that drunk. I showed that I stuff my bra but I didn't whip my tit out.
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
Regardless of how one feels after a break up, whiskey must be consumed.
I'm not going out, it's sweat pants and gallon vodka night at my place and I'm the only one on the guest list.
This is because you lost at fooseball isn't it?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
I woke up thinking it was Friday. I was disappointed (to say the least). I am pretty sure I have gained the quarantine fifteen (but I won’t know until I try to put something other than elastic-waisted shorts on). And I am probably going to need dentures because I am grinding my teeth so much. But hey--this is temporary, right?
Randomize
