One girl and one boy is just not enough.
there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
Just woke up in my fuck buddies bed with, from the looks of her ass and side boob, a girl that is not my fuck buddy. This should be interesting
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
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THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I googled my name and pictures of you drinking showed up. Way to steal my thunder....
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