One girl and one boy is just not enough.
She's just bitter because she lost all the weight only to discover she doesn't have a pretty face after all.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize