Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(715): View more from Wisconsin

ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today

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(713): View more from Texas

my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.

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(408): View more from California

ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me

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(716): View more from New York

I know...I feel like disliking her as a person on facebook

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(415): View more from California

I have another pimple on my ass cheek.

(420): View more from

I'll be there in 10 minutes.

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(330): View more from Ohio

giving a 30 min presentation still drunk is like giving birth, upside down in a pit of snakes while being on fire.

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(219): View more from Indiana

I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed

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(517): View more from Michigan

First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.

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(646): View more from New York

Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast

(646): View more from New York

But I am godly

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