and before you know it i was laying next to him at 2 in the morning with penis and sadness on my breath.
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
