I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
the plan is to continue having sex with all three of them until my birthday, and then once they've given me their presents, they can find out about each other.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I cant believe you went home with her.. Your poor immune system and the shit you put it through.
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
You serve our country by fighting in the sandbox, i serve our country by entertaining rich businessmans' daughters. We each do our part.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
She squirted. We were both surprised. I'm that good.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
