You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
She whispered into my eat that she wanted me to fuck her while her parrot watched...
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Chasing shots with sriracha-covered mini toast was, in retrospect, not the best idea.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I'm having to shit out rocks
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