C thinks vomiting on the batroom floor = reaon not to party. Lies. Party continues.
yes, too bad my tears were being wiped away by tits in my face
ok what kind of idiot turns down casual afternoon sex?
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
Whats proper etiquette for apologizing to your wife for being so drunk you stood up and pissed on the bedroom floor next to the bed?
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
He texts me "just to say hi" and then tells me how hard he is and sends me a dick pic. And I'm like, dude, I'm ordering a burrito right now
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
I'm laying in my bed in the fetal position with a bag of frozen peas on my head and the bathroom trashcan next to me. Fucking tequila.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
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