I just tried to pick my 105-lb puppy up and accidentally fingered its asshole
There are some things we keep to ourselves Brian
thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
my ultimate dream in life is to have sperm so powerful that it will rival that of jim bob duggar.
She got mad when I told her I'd bone her mom. She got MORE mad when her mom heard, and was flattered by it. Proud to say I attract MILFS.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
I think I'm coming down now. I almost started crying because I lost a piece of paper.
He's trying to impress me with how much money he makes. How does he know me so well?
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
Last year you twerked on my Christmas tree and threw up all over the bathroom...in front of my parents. We should probably keep power hour to ONLY an hour this year
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
Randomize
