He seemed more like the type to get donkey punched by a she-male hooker to me
Do you have any idea why the dryer isn't working?
Because you touch yourself at night.
Well It's time to grow up anyways, right? Now that you're graduated and have a job you can't drink uncontrollably
No. Now that I'm graduated I can drink uncontrollably at nicer bars
I hope whoever gets these locks of love doesn't have a drug test anytime soon
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
It's like my ice maker knows when I wanna get drunk
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
I don't even care that it's before church. I feel like God actually wants me to have this shower beer.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
the sex was good. her showing me pictures of her 4 year old daughter afterwards was not.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
