i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
They let me keep the giant cocktail glass because I threw up in it. And made out with the bartender. Europeans are so generous. I'm getting it engraved
At one point, you closed your eyes and asked me which 'six flags' we were at
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Is it really road head if took place on kayaks in the river?
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
I'm pretty sure my calc professer is on coke. He's just too excited for this to be an 8am class.
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