I would like to feed your fingertips to the wolverines.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
you're bored at work aren't you?
I'm toying with the idea of beating off under my desk
The little things make me happy. Little dicks do not.
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
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