i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
oh hey summer self, welcome to endless thirsty thursdays and walks of shame.
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
When I woke up I had three missed calls from the name 'dream krystals'.... If I remember correctly she was the lady at the drive thru at Krystals and her name was Dream.. She wanted to come to the strip club with us... Do you remember?
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
Seriously, in what other class can the final major discussion be what bar you're going to with your prof?
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
The dick pic bandit just sent me a poem about showering..
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
Omg. I'm living macklemores best life. I have someone's granddads dog, I'm about to have someone's grandmas car. I look incredible.
Randomize