i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
I want to see you every morning in the kitchen ass naykid on roller blades making pancakes.
Stop sending me these texts. This is your mom, not your girlfriend.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Friend date it is then. Question: Can friends engage in sexual activities after dates?
on my way to nyc to take a survey about my sexual activity. if you dont hear from me for a few days, assume they had me committed...
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
Now everytime I sit on a toilet I think about having sex with him. Great.
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
Randomize
