I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
1 be hot 2 flirt with everyone 3 use hotness to make people do things for you. It's a simple model.
By the end of the night I was using him as a leg rest and he was handing me pizza rolls when I wiggled my hand. It's a proven method.
They're fucking on the bed next to me. I took adderall and smoked so there's no fucking help for me.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
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