Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Sometimes when I see pregnant women, I wonder what position they were in when they got knocked up. Then I gag a little.
I put it into a sports analogy for him: there are three teams in the league- friends, fuck buddies, and dating, and the fuck buddies roster is full, pick an alternate team
There is a girl in bio drinking beer out of a starbucks cup with a straw
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
If he would've shaved his beard when we first broke up, getting over him would've been so much simpler. That asshole.
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Well I got black out drunk before the rehearsal dinner and berated my family with insults. But other then that it was a good time
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
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