I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
white trash or talent: driving, 1 hand on the wheel, 1 holding a cell phone & talking & smoking without using hands..in an old beater pickup..
Both
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
I five year old is judging me because I just opened a bottle of Sam Adams with my teeth before 8am
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
Watching elf, eating a tub of ice cream, and coming to terms with the fact that I haven't had sex in 5 months. Happy fucking holidays.
I kept having to give myself encouraging advice like, "you know how a path works"
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
I have two choices: tits or tacos. I just can't decide.
Randomize
