dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
see if i had a dick i'd definitely smack people in the face with it
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Pretty sure I can show you the text you sent me stating some interest in my penis entering your mouth if said circumstances were met.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I told him I wanted to "ride him like a show pony" I think he gets the picture
And we're now at 8 people from the office coming to my desk to ask me "do you feel better?".
You are the voice of reason. And I'm bringing wine. Like seriously this is his last chance. Don't touch me once, shame on you.. Don't touch me twice, shame on me
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize