Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
do you think you could subtly ask him about the dimensions of his penis?
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
He kept moaning America instead of Erica while fucking me.
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
Um I think everyone drunk and there's some douche on violin.
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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