You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
I bet him anal if they won...the one time Detroit decides to win, it had to be this week
people at meijer look at you funny when you have 37 bottles of champagne in your cart.
I'm sexting at the thanksgiving dinner table...this is a new holiday tradition.
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
I just dried my bra with your hair straightener because the drier is broken again.
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
I'm proud of all of us. Somehow we all survived another Jägerbomb Tuesday
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
His name isnt in my phone as “Satan’s spawn” for no reason. #devildick
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I hope you know, that by sending me a cat meme back, you've entered in a cat picture battle; which never has an end in sight.
The duel has begun.
Randomize
