Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
So I just bought underwear that says "I'm taken." Just know that when I cheat on my bf with you, that's what I'm wearing
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
You kept hugging the big bouncer & feeling the other ones beard
Totally just sport flirted the shit out of a girl on a wheelchair. I've done my good deed for the day.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Going to the pool bar doesn’t exactly count as “exploring”
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
Randomize
