i just hate vaginas for liking penis's insside them
Thank God. You really dodged a small penis there.
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to hit on your nurse while getting an HIV test.
Tried to dodge fire in poncho. Fell through fence. Blood everywhere.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
in the future we should consider sippy cups so we can drink and passout accordingly
We did blind alcohol taste testing and she got 10 of 10. I'm in love.
Randomize
