yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
tried to be sexy and unbutton his shirt with my teeth. ended up slobbering all over it. thank god he was already passed out
this is not okay. even my mom refers to me as a sorostitute.
I knew the only reason I bought a smartphone was to play "You're Havin My Baby" on the way to cvs to buy Plan B.
He said he got laid, but you and i both know he was too high to leave his house.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
How did I end up in some random dudes car?
Some guy came up to you and asked if you knew how to drive stick.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
Randomize
