..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
you know what sucks? talking to chicks you dont want to have sex with
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
Someone came in the potted fern
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Tomorrow's Mother's Day and the only thing I can afford is beer and the McDonalds dollar menu. Do you think a Budweiser and a Big Mac says thank you for me fucking up your life since 1990?
Dude. Woke up this morning wearing that chick's panties. 8/10, would recommend. I love tequila.
I want to conceive our bastard child on an athletic field. Why can't we make this happen?
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