my desire to fuck abstract ideas (bravery, love, popsicls,,) increases by 8bajillion% when I'm high
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Trying not to look at her chest is like trying to not hear a fire engine racing by.
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
Dude you better come get your girl, she's sitting here eating a tub of pasta salad muttering to herself about gypsies.
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
