Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
I told her it just looked small because my balls were gigantic. She bought it.
what has become of my life if the best thing thats happened to me this week is that i discovered my cleavage as the best hiding spot ever for weed.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
it's like your virginity...sometimes you have to pretend like it's still there
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
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