The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
he was persistant. I supposedly owe him a bj from high school.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
U owe me five dollars for that paper towel you bet i wouldnt eat last night
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
I guess she thought her walk of shame would be more dignified if she stole my dog
I caught her walking around with a fake mustache, wearing a sombrero and holding an empty carton of milk. She's a hopeless cause.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Dude I should have just gone home with the guy with dreads and the cat
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
I feel like you can't break up with someone on 420. It's against stoner code
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I just threw up in the bushes and my gardener started clapping...
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