You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
My dick has been in way too much crazy the past 2+weeks, but hey it feels good to fuck consistently again
What happened last night? I just woke up and there's like 15 mcflurry cups on the floor
You don't remember stealing them?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
